BLOG BY ROOHI JAIN
4 Ways of how to cope up with two children of lesser gap
In a span of 11years of motherhood and mollycoddling my two twinnies like youngsters, my adventurous journey has upskilled me. My home is filled with toys, books, stationery and every craft item available. Every day they take up dual activities varying from Youtube 5min crafts, a new pancake recipe, Exploring Amazon from the gadgets to find out compost gardening techniques. They leave no nook and cranny of the house unfathomed. In the entire scenario, the only aspect that awestruck me is 10years later, my kids won’t remember the house or me being frenzied, however, just a fascinating reminiscence about their sibling interests and the quality time we spent together engaging ourselves. Let us seize every moment we spend with them.
In my motherhood journey, I have learned a handful of life lessons that I believe you, as a mom, must learn as well. Juggling a job, beautiful children, loving partner, friendships, household chores and other social interactions are never easy. However, if all mothers are to have those as excuses, then no kids would have lived as happy and bright right at this very moment. Let me appraise you some tips on parenting youngsters while understanding their emotional quotient.
1. Mother, an influencer
I believe that I am an influencer and have an incredible opportunity to make them future-ready. I must give them unconditional love to establish trust and a firm foundation of emotional intimacy in their life. As a mother, I am unwilling to negotiate and always teach the value of every single thing. Navigating life with two almost same-aged kids is fun but tricky too at the same time. When you are trying to avert a massive tantrum of the elder daughter’s demanding nature while calming a submissive younger son, all we need is practical advice that greater needs first. And if one kid has to wait for a minute while you tend to the other, remember: “This is where kids learn life lessons like how to share and Wait for their turn,” says psychotherapist Yael Sank, of Soho Parenting, a family counselling center in New York City. Therefore, it must be taken as a lesson and training them to handle the situation rather than feeling frustrated at that time and situation.
2.Always a mother BUT a friend first
Don’t you respect your friends, and treasure those who are there for you emotionally? Children too love the company of their parents since the tender times and count them as their first friends. We should foster this bond by playing games, watching movies together, going on a date with them and above all share real-life experiences with them, just like a bud that is ready to blossom. These are assured approaches that are free from doubt. You need to teach them how to play first if you need your “me time”. Once they have learnt to play genially with each other then you have plenty of time for yourself. Especially, in this case, you must feel blessed parents because they already have company for themselves. It is only the initial step that you need to make to be their buddies.
3.Observe a family hour every day so they can learn love
You must be wondering all the time that siblings of the same age scuffle a lot, increasing your agitation to an unimaginable level. What do you need to do in such a situation?
It is quite simple to showcase your love as well as moral behaviour so that they adopt by observing you leading to the formation of a cordial relationship with each other.
It can be achieved through-
1. A few minutes of conversation while you’re cleaning up after dinner or right before bedtime can keep you tuned in and establish open communication. Even children who seem to have forgotten who their parents are, for the other 23 hours of a day, often respond well to a goodnight hug and check-in chat once they’re lounging in bed.
2. In addition to these, short daily check-ins, establish a regular weekly routine for doing something special with your teen, even if it’s just going out for ice cream or a walk together. There are ample topics to discuss from school, news headlines, topics, mindsets, future, aspirations, behavioural issues and so on.
This way they will establish trust between each other.
4. Tough stuff is over faster
Having kids closely spaced often offers logistical benefits. If they’re close in age, they can probably take the same music classes and go to the same storytimes. They’ll even go to the school together at some point. Common friends, same topics to discuss, similar choices of music will eventually get them bonded. Remember to relish this time as a feast when they will grow up together and share responsibilities… As a mother, it’s astounding when you, your son and your daughter share a bond of confidante.
“Pride is one of the seven deadly sins; but it cannot be the pride of a mother in her children, for that is a compound of two cardinal virtues — faith and hope.”
— Charles Dickens, Nicholas Nickleby